Tomorrow I turn 28 and that has me thinking a lot about how I’ve changed and grown throughout the years, particularly in my 20’s as they draw closer to an end. Change is such a healthy thing and should never be feared but rather embraced with curiosity, acceptance and excitement. I have evolved so much in a short amount of time and so I wish to share with you today just how I’ve changed so you too can reflect on your own development. I’m going to touch on aesthetics such as style and interests as well as the deeper layers of who I’ve become in regards to beliefs and personal progression. I also want to state what hasn’t changed and probably never will as those aspects help me understand who I truly am and what matters most.
My style has changed a lot from the beginning of my 20’s to now but it has also retained its unique quality that I adore in clothing. I’ve always been the type to pick up items that are a little bit different and this remains constant. In the last couple of years, my adoration for hippie, new-age attire has slowly calmed down. It wasn’t that long ago that I would never leave the house without a headband, tie-dye or statement jewellery pieces. I was fond of lots of bright colours, patterns and anything that flowed comfortably. Nowadays, I enjoy dressing in much more basic shades with a flair of bohemian thrown in. If I wear a black skirt and white shirt, I like to add a velvet collar, floppy hat or one coloured necklace/bracelet. If I wear a peasant top, I like to dress it down with tight jeans or leggings. I would say I have a much more retro, preppy style now with lots of 70’s thrown in. Having said that I still absolutely love bell-sleeves, the store ~Tree Of Life~ and lace which was the style of my beautiful, dream wedding dress. This will never change and I’m all about projecting boho vibes in my outfits.
My interests/hobbies have also moved away from ultra-spiritual to more creative. I used to be fascinated by crystals, chakras, reikii, aromatherapy, charms and more. I practiced yoga and meditation daily which was fantastic but in present day I have found relaxation in the forms of journaling, reading and exercising. I still practice yoga every Monday but no more than that. I prefer more energetic workouts now (which will probably change again and I’m okay with that) such as running, cross-training, body-attack classes and cardio-boxing. For so much of my life I never broke a sweat and now I’m enjoying the exhilaration that comes with an increased heart-rate and improved fitness levels. My taste in music is the same – I love anything and everything. My taste in books has always been YA forever with classics thrown in. I still enjoy gaming and the same types of shows/movies. My overall physical look is pretty much consistent. I have a small frame but slowly working on developing tone and definition now where there was none before. My diet and lifestyle is still 100% vegan and this will never change. I care so much more about my health since I began my self-love journey. I have not calorie-counted in years and my diet consists of 95% whole-foods. I believe in nourishing and eating until you’re full and satisfied. I’ve never felt better living this way. Veganism is wonderful for our health, the planet and most importantly, the animals.
Once again, I have moved away from a lot of spiritual beliefs to a more logical, practical view of the world. Being married to a man of science means I ask a lot of questions now, do my research and base a lot more of my conclusions on facts. The one major spiritual belief that I still hold and always will pertains to fate, destiny and knowing everything happens for a reason. I trust in the universe and truly believe that things occur the way they are meant to at the right place and time. I manifest, radiate positivity and practice gratitude daily. I still feel so connected to the earth and all beings but I am just a little more grounded in my day-to-day life and look into things first before taking them as gospel. With a strong belief in manifestation comes the realisation that anything is possible. I’m not afraid to ask the universe for my dream life now and love watching things unfold naturally. I also constantly live with the ‘big picture’ in mind. I don’t take my loved ones for granted, I take risks, follow my dreams and rid myself of things that no longer serve me.
It’s no secret that people walk in and out of our lives until the day we die. Relationships change, grow (sometimes for the better, sometimes not) and we also adjust to the way we relate to others. It wasn’t until I was getting married that I realised who my true friends really were. They are small in number but each of them are so special to me. I definitely believe in quality over quantity and it’s pretty clear to me that the current company I keep will be around for a long time. I have realised how important it is to be around positive, inspiring people that bring out the best in me. I also relate a lot differently to people now. Unfortunately a lot of disappointment in others has led me to this point but it seems a far more sensible approach now anyway. The old me used to throw herself at new people. I saw only their good points and wouldn’t for a second consider that they could turn around and let me down. When they inevitably did, I was crushed and it took me so long to recover. These days, I am still friendly, kind, polite and interested in getting to know strangers but I hold a little back for myself. I accept that at any moment it could change and this has paved the way for much more realistic interactions. I’m grateful for that.
In terms of romantic relationships, once I began to love myself…I found Francis! In my early 20’s I dated out of boredom or low self-esteem. I only took up with people that showed interest in me because I thought I had to take what I could get. Once I developed my strong self-worth, looked inward and faced some confronting truths, I turned my entire life around. I started over. I found a man I truly adored who adored me right back. He was a whole, happy person and so was I. We came together and fell madly in love. Years later, we are married and couldn’t be happier. I’ve said this before but Francis is the guy you go for when you have high self-esteem. He is the rainbow at the end of a storm. He is my soft place to fall. I am so unbelievably lucky to have him as my husband and best friend.
My goal as a young 20 year old was to work in a historical field; be that a museum, gallery, heritage centre or in archiving. I obtained this qualification at University and believed it to be my true calling. After years of volunteering, doing unpaid internships and applying like crazy with no success, I made peace with the fact that it wasn’t my time to work in this industry. As I reach 28 years old, I would still like this to become a reality someday but I have also accepted that I’m never truly going to be a career-woman or somebody that is interested in the workforce. I would much rather spend my life with my loved ones, writing, creating and seeing the world. When Francis and I have children someday soon, I will be a stay-at-home mother, raising them until they both go to school (yes we want 2 kids). Having children and a family is the most important thing to me and something I value above all else. If my books and blog takes off, I can make a living from that otherwise I will make sure I write whenever possible, wherever possible and earn an income in a field like museums or libraries to satisfy me. Life’s too short to travel down the wrong path. Love yourself and you’ll know what’s right for you.
6.) OVERALL MINDSET
Self-love is and always will be the focus of my life. It sets the tone for our entire existence. When we love ourselves, we are able to live in line with our true values, be the best versions of ourselves for others and radiate happiness from the inside out. I will never stop checking in with myself and making sure I am content with each area of my life. If something feels wrong, I will adjust it. If something feels right, I will chase it until I discover its purpose. I feel so much more engaged in my own life since removing myself from social media in 2016. I love not having those apps on my phone. I have clear aspirations and will stop at nothing to make them come true. In just 1 week, Francis and I are going on the trip of a lifetime to Europe and travelling through the UK, Italy & Greece. We are calling it our ‘last hurrah’ trip because once we return, we will be ready to start creating our beautiful little family and big holidays like this one will need to take a backseat for a while. I know we are both heading in the right direction as long as we have each other and at just 28 years old, I feel like I’ve lived the most blessed existence already. As the saying goes, ‘what a wonderful thought it is that some of the best days of our lives haven’t happened yet…’
Please comment down below your own thoughts and reflections. Have you changed much? What stands out to you in terms of personal development? I’m looking forward to seeing just how much I’ve changed from this post in 5-10 years!
Thank you for reading. Peace & Love xoxo