Today I want to discuss The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Yesterday Francis and I celebrated 7 years of being together (4 years of marriage in October!) so I thought it would be fitting to tell you what our love languages are, the five different types and what they all mean. I highly recommend taking the online test (click here) with your partner so you can learn more about one another, how you like to show love and ultimately how you like to be loved. It is a great way to meet your partner’s emotional needs and ask for what you need in return. Without further ado, let’s get into it!
WHAT ARE THE 5 LOVE LANGUAGES?
The 5 Love Languages are: Words of Affirmation (showing love with words), Physical Touch (showing love with affection), Quality Time (showing love by spending time together), Acts of Service (showing love with actions) & Receiving Gifts (showing love by giving gifts). The quiz I linked above allows you to discover which one is most important to you. You can also take the test if you’re single, a teenager or for a child. The author, Gary Chapman, believes every single person has one primary love language and a secondary love language. By understanding how we like to be loved, we can strengthen the bond with our spouse, parent or friend and in turn, provide them with the same treatment. Something important to remember: you will tend to show love the way you want to receive love; which can cause issues if your love language isn’t the same as your partner’s. For example, if your love language is Receiving Gifts, you may expect your lover to be super appreciative anytime you shower them in material goods. However, if their love language is Words of Affirmation, they may prefer you to say you love and appreciate them over getting a gift. This is why it’s important to take the quiz and find out. It’s completely free by the way!
WHAT ARE MINE & FRANCIS’S LOVE LANGUAGES?
Francis & I took the test together a couple of years ago. Interestingly, my love language was at a very high percentage over all the others and his was tied between two. Receiving Gifts was the lowest on both of our results.
My love language is Acts of Service which means lightening the load is the key to my heart. When Francis takes on a job I normally do or proofreads my blogs and helps me take pictures for them, I’m a happy clam! My second love language was Quality Time.
Francis’s love languages are a tie between Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. He loves spending time with me, even if we are just doing nothing together side by side. He also says lots of loving things all day long. When I read his results, I understood that the best way to make him feel loved is to do those exact things in return. I’ll be honest. I’m not a words person. The whole Acts of Service thing proves that. However, it feels nice telling him how much he means to me or seeing his face light up when I suggest watching a movie together. If I could give all my readers one huge piece of advice it’s this: don’t keep showing love how you want to be loved. It won’t work (unless you share the same love language). Take the time to learn what your partner needs and give it to them.
I’m looking forward to doing this test with Abigail one day so I can provide her with the specific type of love she needs. At the moment I would say hers is Quality Time but that could be because she’s a toddler!
I hope you enjoyed this post. Let me know down below what your love language is. How does your partner/friend/child like to be loved? I’m so fascinated by this topic and truly believe in it. Thanks for reading!
Peace & Love xoxo